Den of Thieves, review: Thieving Merrimen and a cop called Nick

There is little Gerard Butler does here that he has not done before, more than once. The bulgy steely eyes, the scowl, the contorted mouth speech (is there something Scottish about it?), the man on the brink... As producer, he could have either picked a better script, or, as actor, moulded himself better. He decides to remain he.

Den of Thieves is as much about thievery as the Afghanistan war is about a flying carpet. Our brand of thieves are a bunch of ex militia-men who pack high impact explosives, gun down adversaries in cold blood, and let loose artillery fire that must be patented by the producers without the slightest delay. They rob two banks. TWO. Including the California branch of the Federal Reserve! Naw, I don’t think there is any such thing, but let’s begin at the beginning.

An empty armoured truck is hijacked by a gang led by Ray Merrimen (Pablo Schreiber), a convict just released from jail. Detective Nick "Big Nick" O'Brien (Gerard Butler) investigates. He has been monitoring Merrimen and his crew for a while, whereas Merrimen holds a grudge against Nick for killing one of his men. Nick finds suspect Donnie at the bar where he works, and kidnaps (yes, that’s what he does) him for interrogation.

At home, Nick's wife Debbie (Dawn Olivieri) discovers on his phone that Nick has been seeing other women, particularly strippers. Incensed, she leaves with their daughters and has her lawyer serve Nick divorce papers. Later, Nick spots Donnie at a restaurant with Merrimen and his crew, which makes them suspicious when Nick calls Donnie out.

At their hideout, Merrimen has his right-hand man Levi (Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson) roughly interrogate Donnie to make sure he hasn't revealed their plans to Nick. Donnie, a race driver who claims he can touch 178 mph, which is ideal for a getaway, convinces him that he hasn't told Nick anything about the robbery. Merrimen has Donnie gain access into the Federal Reserve by working as a food deliveryman for a Chinese outlet. In the ceiling of the Bank's bathroom, he stashes an extra bag of food, and a delivery uniform, in preparation for the day of the big heist.

Heist it is, and you’ve got to give it to them. The parallel robbery, the ransom demand, the blasts and the ‘getaway’ are meticulously worked out. Right from the start, when the hoofs hold up and hijack a big empty, delivery truck, you are in then guessing game. Old buddies

Christian Gudegast (co-wrote A Man Apart; also wrote Zero Hour and The Experiment) and Paul Scheuring, who co-wrote A Man Apart with Gudegast, come together with some good punches.

As the narrative goes, you realise more and more that the writers’ sympathies are not with the cops at all. The whole track of Nick’s broken marriage and the pining parent goes nowhere. Hardly ever does the cop out-manoeuvre the gang. Finally, when Eureka dawns, all the policemen do is run and run and run... from Los Angeles to San Francisco (how far’s that!?). There is a great, funny moment just before the end, that could lead to the lawman cracking the case, but that is left for a sequel. And spoilers? No thanks. Why did Nick confront Donnie when he was seated with the gang in the bar? Don’t ask me. But yes, do enjoy the scene

wherein a groom to be is introduced to a bunch of terror-striking hunks, with their biceps bursting and triceps thrusting, as the bride’s brothers. Sounds familiar? Let it pass.

Action and thrills come easy to Gudegast, not so emotions and drama. Almost all such scenes, whether they involve torture of Donnie or the marriage malaise of the O’Briens, none of them rise to any levels that could help balance the adrenaline pumping hard-core crime caper. One whole scene of shooting practice in a gallery leads nowhere.        

Not much more need be said about Butler, except that he sports a standard beard. He retains all the square jaw, spiteful persona that he developed in Law Abiding Citizen almost a decade ago. His London Has Fallen writer Gudegast, who also co-wrote the vigilante drama A Man Apart with Paul Scheuring, milks the elements that define Butler. Canadian Pablo Schreiber, Leiv’s half-brother, gets to play villain-in-chief, getting two real scenes to show some acting talent. Machine gun firing is not acting! It is O’Shea Jackson Jr. will have you confused. Whose side is he on? 50 Cent Jackson (Spy, All Things Fall Apart, Southpaw) as a gangster with a 50” chest is right for the job.

Brian Von Holt is Murph Connors, the cop who hates Nick (now that sounds new, doesn’t it?). At the receiving end of Nick’s wicked, wicked ways is Dawn Olivieri, as Debbie O’Brien. ‘Technical support’ is provided by Cooper Andrews, an actor with a strong Filipino look. A man who goes by the name of Eric Braeden plays a part named Ziggy Zerhusen. I just cannot remember who that was. But why is it important? Trivia, really. He is Christian Gudegast’s father.

It has to be acknowledged that writing a crime caper, with a double-whammy required special skills. May be that is what kept this project in abeyance for a full...14 years.

At 2 hours 20 minutes, I am willing to give up the den half-way.

Rating: **

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZkUlNwiEBY

Can’t resist this: What will the sequel be called? A Den of Geeks?